Sunday, September 14, 2014


I've been thinking about being reunited in Heaven with my family, for close to 30 years now...And 2 Cor. 4:18 is a favorite of mine:

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

For bereaved moms…this may seem like topsy-turvy thinking here…It seems to be saying that those in Heaven, are more truly alive than those on earth! They are never ending- whereas down here- we're all subject to decline and decay. I almost feel as if I should rejoice that my children are fully alive in Heaven…and mourn for those of us (including children) now dying a slow, painful physical death here on this planet

But of course... it did take "awhile" to come to the realization that my children have, in essence, won the Lottery…
I had to gradually relinquish Michael and Lisa (and Tim) to Our Father, before He restored them back to me- through a deepened Faith. I feel much closer to them now- than I did right after it seemed like they'd been yanked right out of my mothering arms. It is nice to be able to look at photos and see so much more in them. And to not let bother me what I used to see…like an undarned hole in Michael's sock-glaringly evident to me…once...

All our earthly joy, as great as it is, is still merely temporary. It doesn't hold a candle to the joy that can never be ripped away from us, in Heaven. Even the word "temporal" as in "all temporal joy" has its roots in the Latin word for "time", which is "tempus". 

After my bereavement, for years, I thought deeply on the verse's meaning ( cited earlier). I concluded- there was really no way I could ever believe, any of us gets "cheated", by going to Heaven early. Contrary to popular and frequently stated opinion, I was not the fortunate one to be left behind…My being a survivor was yet to be realized...

I believe recovery from child bereavement for a Christian, really does comes down to one word…TRUST. If I call myself a Christian, I hold to certain beliefs as truths. And in times of trouble, that's when I really need to trust in those beliefs.  I have always felt it's a "make it or break it" time- when push comes to shove after a beloved's death... and it's time to turn on the faith engine, rev it up with Trust... and get going…But first the car has to start…and that may take a bit of time to restore...

Lately, I see an area where I can improve my faith life. I've been so super-focused, for years, on the topic of life in Heaven for my children/ for myself. I realize that I have neglected to abandon my usual "knee- jerk" response, in regard to the daily stressors of life down here. I have the utmost faith in the next life being suburb. I'm going to try to stop worrying so much down here, and to "enjoy the ride" more! I will start asking Jesus to help me with that. God assures us, that "For everyone who asks, receives." Matthew 7:8 Thanks be to God!

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